Thursday, November 18, 2004

So, Pacman, Tom DeLay, and a lawyer walk into a post-game party...

House GOP Changes Rules to Protect DeLay
You know, I could be a little off here, but I'd rather see them protect 'DeLaw.' Just a thought.

The backing for DeLay "took on a life of its own; it was like a tsunami," Rep. Ray Lahood, R-Ill., said in comparing Republican support to a large sea wave.

Yeah. They say media content is written at a reading level around 8th grade or something like that, but...COME ON!!! I'm a little insulted. Tsunami means big wave. Wow. Thank you AP. Thank you.

Pacman breaks out of the arcade
RED ALERT: Guard your apples and, uh, super power-ups with your lives. Be on the look-out for a rather small yellow circle thing on the loose in a neighborhood near you. He, according to one official, is "very unarmed" but still a threat to society at large. Most security experts feel comfortable that he will soon end up giving himself away because, as one man put it, "he has a REALLY big mouth." If you have any ghost-like pets named Inky, Blinky, Pinky, or Clyde, it would probably be best you keep them inside for the time being.

Suspicious powder sent to law firm
Officials found a suspicious looking powder on Wednesday. To determine its safety, it was sent to a local law firm. "We view it as a win-win situation," said one police officer.

Men sentenced for post-game death
The presiding judge ordered the families of the deceased men pay for the emotional suffering caused by their deaths. "It completely ruined the moment," said the judge in his decision, "Deaths should take place pre-game or in-game, never post-game."


Anonymous said...

Your re-phrasing of the law firm article is the best.
The DeLay article was great too.
I'm so excited that I'm actually learning stuff in my govn't class this year. I knew who DeLay was!
(My high school govn't class was a joke. I'd rather have taken Croy's.)

Anonymous said...

hey! the pac man story isn't as wierd once you read the article, but "human pacman?" now that might be a little scary....

Anonymous said...

Seriously, I read your page to kepe up with current events, because it's funny to read your comments afterward... good work reporter CJ! I loved Croy's class, even if we had differing political views, I still learned more from him then my current gov't teacher.