Thursday, September 23, 2004

Screening for those crazy liberal Voters

So why do they call it the electoral college anyway? It seems more like a third grader came up with it...

Report: U.S. Airport Screeners Missed Weapons
In an unnecessary report released today, it was found airport screeners didn't know what to do with themselves when no weapons were present. Most Americans were already aware that screeners long for weapons so badly, they'll go through anything to try to find them. One anonymous TSA bag check expressed remorse for the good old days of killer toe-nail clippers and biologically hazardous shoes, "I've missed weapons," he said.

In response to claims that screeners were allowing weapons to slip past security, the Bush administration wasn't willing to admit defeat so easily. "That report was a year ago when the tests were made. Changes were made. We improved our training of the screeners and we've tested them since then and the proficiency rate has improved dramatically," U.S. Undersecretary for Homeland Security Asa Hutchinson told Fox News. He cited a recent poll of air-travelers that found 97% "royally ticked" with the way they had been treated.

SERIOUSLY, it's truly pathetic that screeners missed explosives, guns, knives and box cutters at 15 different airports. What in the world are our priorities? We let dangerous weapons slip through, but made sure that Yusuf Islam (the artist formerly known as Cat Stevens) was deported for "potential terrorist linked" activity. Sure sounds like a legitimate threat... Seriously, it's time the TSA gets a clue.

Bush: Terrorists May Plan More Attacks
Defense secretary Donald Rumsfeld suggested today that a little democracy is better than no democracy. "Let's say you tried to have an election and you could have it in three-quarters or four-fifths of the country in some places you couldn't because the violence was too great," he said. "So be it. Nothing's perfect in life. You have an election that's not quite perfect. Is it better than not having an election? You bet." If not taken in proper context, it would appear that Rumsfeld was referring to the upcoming Iraqi elections. However, what he was actually saying was that if states like California, New York, or Massachusetts choose not to vote, it would be OK by him.

A Bush official later clarified that what Rumsfeld had meant to say was that "Nothing is perfect in life - except George Bush and the incredibly wonderful Republican party."

SERIOUSLY, check this out from the article: In a rare admission of error, Bush said he should not have said as he did Tuesday that the CIA was just guessing in a report this summer that gave a gloomy intelligence assessment that raised the prospect of Iraq tumbling into civil war. "I used an unfortunate word, 'guess,'" Bush said. "I should have used 'estimate.' Hmm...sounds like he's been reading my blog... Just kidding.


Anonymous said...

Nice style! As long as you keep that satirical wit in place. "Royally ticked" as a quote was great!

Anonymous said...

You're good...BUT George W reading your Blog???????

son cho said...

"Tứ Huyết địa, Lâm gia? Được rồi, tại hạ đã biết!"

"Lâm lão, tại hạ muốn hỏi thăm ngươi một chuyện?"
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trung tâm ngoại ngữ
"Chuyện gì?"

"Lâm lão có biết trên Viễn Cổ đại lục phải chăng tồn tại một gia tộc tên là Tiêu tộc hoặc là cường giả họ Tiêu nào đó!"

Tiêu Viêm muốn biết những người trở thành Đấu Đế cường giả trên Đấu Khí đại lục trước đây phải chăng đã đến Viễn Cổ đại lục.

"Tiêu tộc?"

Lâm Vân có chút nhíu mày, suy tư cả buổi, mới nói: "Tiêu tộc thực lực như thế nào, trong đại tộc theo ta được biết, ngược lại không có tộc nào là Tiêu tộc cả!"

"Thực lực Tiêu tộc sao? Có lẽ không tệ a, ít nhất cũng có thể có mấy người cấp bậc Đấu