Tuesday, September 07, 2004

News Headlines

Were you like me? Did you see "Clinton's surgery considered a success" and think, "He's dead?!"

But seriously, after the whole pretzel scare there a few years back, we all should realize that Presidential health is no joke. I mean, aside from my three fellow Wyoming residents, does anyone really want to see Dick Cheney in control of the free world? Oh wait.....

Other Stories of Note:

Medicare Costs to Rise Record 17 Percent
In case you couldn't figure it out from the headline, that's 17 percent of your income...

Returns in Alaska Republican Primaries
The official results from the Republican National Convention:
In favor of George Bush: Joe and Sam
In favor of Joe: Sally

Kerry Assails Deficit As Bush's Fault
John Kerry in attacking his opponent, George W. Bush, once again showed his academic superiority today in his criticisms of the President.

"W is for wrong," said Kerry.

Kerry head speechwriter, Big Bird, is credited with composing the fiery message.

Bush Says Kerry's Using Old Dean Lines
Another sign that Kerry is really opening up to the public came today as well. George Wrong Bush today accused the democrat of stealing Howard Dean's campaign lines. Yes folks, it's true, apparently John Kerry last night almost raised his voice above a normal conversational tone, drawing comparisons to the now infamous "Iowa Screech."

Fla. Voting Machines Pass Primary Test
The test went incredibly well. Thanks to new protective measures no chads were unwillingly impregnated. The only hitch came when they actually had Florida residents use the machines, but officials quickly rectified the problem. Though it's still early, preliminary results show Al Gore still leading by a few percentage points. However, some political experts were surprised at the strong second-place finish by Mickey Mouse.

That's all I've got....

4 comments:

yollama foggyblogger said...

I appreciate the ramblings, but I not sure I could
trust somebody whose sole interests on their profile
are the Boston Red Sox! RAMBLE ON MAN!!!

Anonymous said...

Tell us how you REALLY feel about this election; let it all out! We need to hear from WY residents who aren't related to an infamous VP. Your pals in Florida (until the next hurricane comes)!

Anonymous said...

CJ - Aren't you TOO BUSY studying to post these ramblings now that you're in COLLEGE??? OK, if you have time for this, you have time to change the message on your answering machine at home!!!! (please???)

Anonymous said...

its amanda but i have no user name. he he he. love the bit about clinton. rock on dude. Go Rams!